As one of my homegirls once said, “Self-care is an everyday practice, not just me reacting when I’m already burned out.” I know the past few months have been uniquely stressful for a number of people, but as of late I’m actually hearing articulated more. I know that just because you’re home a lot these days doesn’t change the fact that you’ve got a lot on your plate. In fact, at a time like this, I imagine that internally, you may be carrying a little more than usual. So, I was thinking now would be a good time to revisit a conversation about ways to practice self-care through the lens of living simply.
Have you ever wondered how to spark change and overcome obstacles within your family? If so, then look no further! Today, we will learn how to prevent certain events from ruining communication methods within your life.
What are the types of topics that people don’t talk about freely? - 6:55
Out of all the topics, guess the two that people don’t like to discuss. If you guessed finances and insecurities, then you’re correct! Many people feel compelled to keep their business to themselves; being silent about these issues, though, is what creates generational curses. Yikes!
When generational curses start in the home, there will be no time until it begins to affect the children. Therefore, it is becoming even more crucial to foster effective communication between parent and child.
What advice do you have for people trying to bounce back from financial turmoil? - 19:04
If you’re currently in a financial bind, keep your head up! There are several ways to cut down on your financial troubles and live a life of abundance:
Any thoughts to leave with the audience? - 33:59
If there’s one thing that Jamey Jenkins wants to leave for the audience, it’s that sometimes the best things in life aren’t things at all. What does this mean? Well, memorable moments in life are not all about material things. They can be memories, time spent with people, and more.
Jamey Jenkins is a first generation graduate of Alcorn State University. He completed his bachelors in Political Science in 2002. He is a member of Kappa Alpha Psi, Inc. Since that time he has been the successful owner of multiple companies. He is also a 16 year veteran at Nissan North America. Jamey is the Founder and CEO of Hello Black man enterprises. Hello Black Man was originated as a Journal series to restore communication within the black community and more importantly within the black family. It has sparked a fire and that company is now exploring apparel, jewelry, podcast, conferences, building a nonprofit organization to support the black man throughout life and much more. Hello Black Man will be globally known and accepted as a breakthrough. The movement can be found on all social media platforms, the website helloblackman.com and the journals can be purchased on amazon.
One of the most important things in our lives are the relationships that we have with other people. So, it’s time for us to have an honest conversation about being there for others. Look at all the loving people within your inner circle. They’re always there for you, but have you considered who is there for them? If you haven’t, then today is the day that we discuss how you can be there for these special people!
Doing What's Best For Other People - 2:17
Let’s get one thing straight: Relationships are the fiber of life! When you start any kind of relationship, it’s important to understand that you must be there for them like they are for you. Otherwise, you will constantly run into conflicts and ruin the relationship. Plus, it helps that doing what’s best for them can also be what’s best for you.
Listening To People And Hearing Them Out - 8:38
Listen! No, seriously, sit down and listen to your friends. One of the best ways to show up and show out for them is to make them feel heard. You never know what that person may be going through. Therefore, offering your shoulder for them to cry on is a great start to showing that you care.
Loving People In More Ways Than One- 10:21
Now, here’s the question you must ask yourself: Can you show up for the people in your circle? If you can’t, then maybe it’s time to love them from a distance. Does this mean terminate the relationship with these people? No way! Instead, it means that it’s time for you to take a more passive role in these people’s lives. This means answering their calls, addressing their problems, giving them advice, and more!
Have you ever considered that your purpose and mental health are connected? Like… Has it ever crossed your mind that by not doing what's necessary to take care of your mental health may be what's keeping you from living out your purpose? I found myself thinking about this quite a bit after having this conversation with Tanya. I've always known that our purpose is what keeps us motivated in so many ways. Yet, it never dawned on me until looking at purpose from another lens, that if I don't do what's necessary to take care of my mental health that I can't serve the people who I was put on this Earth to serve.
As someone who has experienced significant loss (a sister, sister in law, and grandmother within two years’ time), Tanya understands the importance of getting the support you need to continue to be well mentally and spiritually. Thus, she charges us to do what we have to do take care of ourselves and put our pride aside to get the help that we may need.
Tanya J. Miller of Tanya J. Miller, LLC, and Talking with Tanya, is an author, speaker, coach, and strategist with a passion for helping people and organizations figure out how to do life and leadership unapologetically on purpose.
Connect with Tanya:
Last month, I did 21 days of gratitude with Mr. Dr. Hudson (it was SO moving and much needed). One of the things that I found myself sharing was being grateful for reading. When I get a good book, I don't want to put it down. It's with the turn of each page that something "comes to me," and I get so excited to see what's next. I really enjoy reflecting of what I’m learning while reading as well. I'm always enthused when I can jump on a call with a friend who has read the book--we indulge in processing and digesting what we took from it.
Recently, I had an "ah ha!" moment when I realized how much reading has helped me with mental wellbeing by shifting my perspective on various topics. As we’re celebrating mental health this month, I thought it would be cool to share with you how turning pages has been transformational for me.
So, here’s to you turning pages (literally) in your life, too.
Don't forget to check out the books I mentioned if you're interested:
*denotes an affiliate link :)
Are you doing what's best for you? Wait… Let me ask that question differently. Are you doing what's best for you so as long as it doesn't bother, disappoint, or upset anybody else? When we think about doing what's best for us, we must truly do the things that are going to make us happy even if other people don't agree. It's not always the easiest thing to do because of the concerns of disapproval or rejection. When we do not make the choices to do what’s best for us, however, we’ll always be miserable. So, in this chat with Nzinga D. Mpenda, we discuss the importance of being authentic, doing what’s best for you, and learning to choose joy.
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance: against such there is no law (Galatians 5:22 – 23). Nzinga D. Mpenda lives her life aligned with the fruit of the spirit. She is a daughter, sister and friend committed to living her life in “the joy” and encourages others to do the same. Nzinga is an entrepreneur and author currently building her publishing company focused on elevating the voices of Black and women writers. An artist with words, she published her first novel “Not In His Shadow” under the pseudonym Ziggy Harris. Her second book, “Who Made the Potato Salad?” is the first book to be released on her publishing company, Get It Girl Publishing. Nzinga holds a BA in Psychology from Shaw University, the oldest HBCU in the South, a MS in Clinical Psychology from Notre Dame de Namur, and an MS in Integrated Marketing Communications from Golden Gate University.
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It sucks when something that you’ve been looking forward to for the longest doesn’t happen. It feels frustrating when you’ve worked hard for something just for things to not work out as you’d hoped. It hurts even more when things fall apart and there’s nothing that you can do about it. Graduation is upon us and this time around is like nothing we have ever seen before. At a moment such as this one, when you have put your all into getting to this place and have been looking forward to this momentous occasion, it is tough to deal with feeling like it was just ripped away. You can even end up feeling even more helpless when you think about there being nothing you can do about it. However, I want you to know that you are not alone, share my story of graduating disappointed when I got my PhD a few years ago, and offer you some perspective for getting this time of your life (and maybe even a few moments in the future).
So, how YOU durin'? The last few weeks have been a lot to process--I'm with you. The thing is that it's a good time for us to press pause for a moment and think about what all of this means. In the midst of frustration, disappointment, and uncertainty... we might not like it, BUT it's a part of life that we learn to ride the wave. So, here's my take on sittin' with sh*t.
A first-generation college graduate, it's important to surround yourself with people who are going to have your back. After all, you weren't created to do this thing called life alone, so be sure that no matter where you go that you'll make it a point to build community.